I feel this deeply
Unfortunately, yes
Tag: truth
In the modern idiom:
“So Bob said […]” indicates that I am directly quoting Bob.
“Then Bob was like […]” indicates that I am paraphrasing Bob.
“And Bob was all […]” indicates that I am paraphrasing Bob, and additionally I am being a dick about it.
I don’t know about you, but I think it’s fantastic that we have a specific grammatical convention for that.
My favourite quotes
“Aim towards the Enemy.” – Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher
“When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.” – U.S. Army
“Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground.” – U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop
“If the enemy is in range, so are you.” – Infantry Journal
“A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what’s left of your unit.” – Army’s magazine of preventive maintenance
“It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.” – U.S. Air Force Manual
“Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo.” – Infantry Journal
“Tracers work both ways.” – U.S. Army Ordnance
“Five-second fuses only last three seconds.” – Infantry Journal
“Bravery is being the only one who knows you’re afraid.” – Col. David Hackworth
“If your attack is going too well, you’re probably walking into an ambush.” – Infantry Journal
“No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection.” – Joe Gay
“Any ship can be a minesweeper … once.” – Anonymous
“Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.” – Unknown Army Recruit
“Don’t draw fire; it irritates the people around you.” – Your Buddies
(And lastly)
“If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him.” – U.S. Ammo TroopThe best for last.
“Any ship can be a minesweeper…once”
Human wisdoms when going to battle
@memecaptainsteverogers @memewarmachinerox you two seem to be the most likely to appreciate this
I think I might be responsible for a couple of those.
You are most powerful when you are most silent. People never expect silence. They expect words, motion, defense, offense, back and forth. They expect to leap into the fray. They are ready, fists up, words hanging leaping from their mouths. Silence? No.
concept: it’s summer morning, me and my love are eating breakfast on terrace with beautiful view on the sea and radiant sunrise, everything is calm, only thing we can hear it’s beautiful sound of the sea and birds singing
I just want to sleep forever in a bed of rose petals wearing lacey pink lingerie and holding a bottle of champagne
him: haha so do you have any fantasies? 😉
me: i’ve published a critically acclaimed new york times bestselling novel and i’m set for life on royalties alone. i attend a charity event for supporters of the arts. i meet lin manuel miranda. he tells me he’s glad to meet me and he enjoyed my book. i burst into tears in front of everyone; nobody says anything about it, they all understand. when i recover we jokingly discuss a stage adaptation. freddie mercury is back from the dead and he’s performing. i look good in every photograph taken that night.
my life is like Chopped except it’s God up there going “here’s a set of 4 mystery ingredients: some form of illness, zero disposable income, an ambiguous sense of self, 4 day old pasta….. you have 30 minutes to come up with some sort of life, with quality. ice cream machine broke”
sleep paralysis is honestly the most bullshit part of being a living thing. sometimes my brain just occasionally screws up and goes ????? uhhhh . cant move. here’s a demon
That’s exactly what it is