Jyn: Literally 95% emojis. Mainly the knife and the tiny devil. She justifies it by saying that the team has so many native languages they should communicate with the universal thumbs up emoji.
Chirrut: Has Baze read the others’ texts for him. Wierdly enough always understands exactly what point Jyn is trying to get across with sentence like “space ship, star, fire, cry face, thumbs up.”
Baze: Full sentences. Always proper grammar and periods. Gets irritated when his kids don’t immediately text him back to let him know they’re OK.
Bodhi: Indecipherable acronyms and pilot jargon. Makes up for it by using a Lot Of CAPITALISATION and !!!! punctuation ????
Cassian: One of those people who literally. can’t. text. at. all. His fingers always hit the wrong keys, spellcheck hates him, and something about texting really fires up the space!spanish/common disconnect in his brain. Sometimes just uses Google translate and sends crappy translations for his work stuff. Also can’t keep track of who he’s texting. 90% of the embarrassing things he’s every done involve sending texts that should have ONLY EVER BEEN SEEN BY JYN to work colleagues. But it also means that he gets mixed up and sends super villains messages like “can you pick up eggs and milk gracias te amo :):)
America is about to be that part in the lion king where where pride rock became all shitty bc Scar became king
have yet to see a better analogy
Are you implying Hilary Clinton’s daughter will assassinate Donald Trump because I’m okay with this
Actually, if we follow the narrative, I think it would be the Obama daughters. Which would be even MORE awesome.
Malia’s gonna fight Trump on the roof of the Whitehouse while it’s on fire.
Didn’t Scar get killed by the hyenas, who turned against him when he tried to throw blame at them while begging for his life?
The equivalent would be Trump cornered by both Obama sisters on the White House roof (yes, while it’s on fire, I can totally believe that Trump will somehow lead to the White House catching fire at some point) insisting that “we’re all friends against the Republican establishment, it’s their fault” and Sasha and Malia quote one of Trump’s tweets back at him to tell him to get the fuck out; Trump scurries away and runs right into Pence and Cruz.
“Our fault, is it, Donald?”
Alternatively, since Scar originally gained the support of the hyenas by promising them a better life with lots of food, Trump is clearly going to fall off the roof of the White House into the arms of the Republican base that voted for him because he promised them a better economy.
Okay but then who’s going to dress in drag and do the hula?
My boyfriend talks in his sleep and because he’s bilingual, he says some hilarious/weird/sometimes creepy shit. I ask him every morning if he remembers saying this stuff and he has no idea about any of it.
Here are some of my favorites:
-”Babe, can you please turn down the brightness of your skin” -After stealing all of the blankets: “This is my right as a human” -After I take the blankets back: “I don’t want your freedom, America. Just blanket” -Sometimes he just says “Hello?” as if he’s answering a phone call -One night he just said “Cabbage” which is weird because he doesn’t know the english word for that when he’s awake. -After spooning me: “You have a nice butt” -”Who is that in the corner?” (terrifying) -”Watch out for the red lady” (even more terrifying) -Sometimes he will say things in German and it sounds like he’s speaking Parseltongue -One time I actually think he said something in Parseltongue -One time he talked about buying a ticket to “everywhere” and then just said “hello?” after two minutes of silence -And my all time favorite: ”This is MY yogurt, Satan”
“A plaque on both your houses!” Mercutio yells
drunkenly, as guards escort him out of the Capulets’ garden at 2am. It’s the
third time this week. Why do the two estates look so similar after dark? They could at least be labeled better.
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